Thursday

Devils Ticket, 5th Row at the Prudential Center: $115

Ten beers at Stadium prices: $85

Brawling with your best friend outside the shittiest strip bar in Newark while the bouncer screams at you and the Russian stripper Prushka runs up in her clear heels yelling, "Frank what are you doing stop!" and when you finally tap out and say I'm done, he looks away and you deck him with a right and it starts all over again while your other friend dances around the madness: FUCKING PRICELESS.